Your test results are in…

Last week, I received results I was not prepared for…

“Wait, what?”

My brain couldn’t wrap around all the things I was being told. I tried to process it on my 45-minute drive home. I called my mom and hashed it all out. I talked in circles with my BF as he graciously tried to follow the confusing timeline.

But no one was as confused as me!

I had been plagued with this illness since I was 13. I started taking meds in my early 20s. Now, almost twenty years later and staring down the barrel of a rapidly approaching 40, I was told I could wean off those meds.

“Excuse me?!?… Did you forget we’re in a pandemic and the last 1.5 years have been the hardest of my life?”

I was told my Major Depressive Disorder was there at one time, but it just wasn’t anymore.

I didn’t know that much like diabetes or cancer, this illness could be fought. It could be overcome. It could be conquered!

I didn’t know that putting in hard (harder than anything I’ve ever done) work could lead to a “reverse diagnosis”.

I still have work to do, and always will. I still have bad days. I’m still human. I still have a few more items on my list that need their asses kicked too.

But I know that if I can beat this - when all the odds were stacked against me, when so many wanted to see me fail, when the only one to pick myself up off the ground sometimes was ME - I can do anything!

My advice? Put up those boundaries. Break generational curses. Tear down the lies that others (and you) have told for so long. Find your peace and protect it like one of your children. Talk to Jesus like he’s your BFF (because he can be that for you).

You’ve got this! I’m living proof that just because a shitty hand was dealt to you, doesn’t mean you have to fold.